What it all Means / Was alles Bedeutet / O que tudo Significa / Qué todo Significa

Depression is your body saying, Fuck you, I don’t want to be this character anymore. You should think of the word depressed as deep rest. Your body needs to rest. It needs deep rest from the character that you’ve been trying to play.

It was more like, you’re supposed to say, you know, we’re important, you’re supposed to say, it’s all going to be alright and you’re supposed to say, that you know whatever you dream can come true and you’re supposed to say all those things. I do believe in manifestation power of that kind of stuff but I don’t believe that any of it matters, you know, this mattering, is, is to me a Human construct born out of a need, same need is, you have to have, you know, deities and things like that.

I believe in an energy of God energy of you know everything is divine, you know, there’s just not there’s no there’s no thing that isn’t divine everything is divine and I’m that and it doesn’t matter to me what’s happening. I’m finding that ultimately the, the freedom from it, is, is something people are kind of hungry for it away they’re like I don’t want to be me either right you know and I and I go well look great because you never have been.

I believe that I had to become a famous you know idea and get all the stuff that people dream about and that accomplished a bunch of, boy, a bunch of things that means don’t you you know that that look like success in order to give up my attachment to those things it’s been a part of the evolution of egos is to spend your first half of your life acquiring and adding thinking you can add to yourself and and it looks great.

I mean it looks great when you got a cool car and you got a good nice clothes and you know and you’re and you’ve done something that people admire but it can never fulfill you. You can ever be happy you know what I mean it’s not it’s not where happiness comes from and you know.

I dealt with depression, you know, a few years ago and people still think while he’s going through you can tell he’s depressed. It’s not. I haven’t known literally none, I have sadness and joy and elation and satisfaction and gratitude beyond belief but all of it is wetter and it just spins around the planet, you know, it’s not, it doesn’t settle me enough to kill me.

The happy place is realizing that you’re everything you know and that there’s no real you involved in the first place yeah it’s a so it’s a weird little semantic jump that you make where it sounds like well that’s totally fucking threatening man, I can’t, I can’t not be me. I built this construct and it’s just ideas they’re just ideas you know the only thing that separates you from an african-american or an African Canadian is an idea, you know, and oh and the weather the adaption to the climate and whatever it is I don’t believe in any of it and and so the feeling of wholeness is is a different feeling than meanness.

They’re all characters that I played, including Jim Carrey, including Joel barish, including any of those things, they’re all characters, you know, they Jim Carrey was a less intentional character right because I thought I was just building something that people would like but it was a character you know so it’s you know I played the guy that was free from concerns.

So that people who watched me would be free from concern you know and in that at a certain point you go like okay well that’s great but you know it’s like the one thing I like people talk about depression all the time the difference between depression and sadness sadness is just you know from happenstance whatever happened or didn’t happen for you or you know grief or whatever it is and depression is your body saying fuck you I don’t want to be this character anymore.

I don’t want to hold up this this avatar that you’ve created in the world it’s too much for me right, you know and you should think of the word I’ve depressed as deep rest deep rest your body needs to be depressed it needs deep rest from the character that you’ve been trying to play you know the Great and Powerful oz I’m the great powerful oz Oh daddy you got me you know kind of thing and you’re just the sweaty guy behind the curtain Conrad it’s an amazing metaphor you know in that movie.

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